On my desk and around my office are little gifts that my mother has given me over the years – a “Dare to Dream” poem, a couple of her photos of fog among the Redwood trees, and the latest addition, a collectible Mother & Daughter porcelain plaque with a quote on it.

Every day when I look up I see a bit of my mom through these items, and feel her love and support. Yet I talk with her, over our video phones, only maybe four to six times a year. We both live busy lives and are both working and raising families; my younger sister is just a year older than my oldest daughter. 

But when I think of my mom, I smile. And that’s how I would love for my daughters to think of me when they are grown. But how does this come about?

Mother-Daughter Duet by mother-daughter team, Cheri Fuller and Ali Plum, promises to show  you (and I) the path.  

Combining stories from their own relationship struggles and successes, their journey of letting go of the mother-daughter dynamic and become friends, with the stories from many other mothers and daughters they interviewed while researching this book, Fuller and Plum provide practical insights  into how we can develop healthy relationships with our daughters and with our own mothers.

At 201 pages, the book is broken into thirteen chapters, plus an introduction and epilogue. You’ll be taken on a journey of engaging with your daughter through early adulthood through marriage, motherhoods, and beyond.

Each chapter is themed for specific hotpoint or issue, like validation, communication, making wedding plans, when your daughter becomes a wife and then a parent, and,  of course, forgiveness.

Both a mother’s point of view and a daughter’s point of view is given for each topic, with a coming together for what is called “two part harmony”.  Discussion questions for each chapter are provided at the end of the book.

One of the things I really like about this book is that Cheri Fuller and Ali Plum do not pretend that they are perfect or have the perfect mother-daughter relationship. They’ve struggled, just like many others and have through trial and error, communication, and counselling have found a better harmony. They are transparent in that in writing the book, they ran into issues within their relationship and found ways to work through them. This, I believe, adds the the credibility and integrity of the insights they share.

As I watch my own daughter grow into a teen, and know that around the corner she will be off on her own, I am heartened to learn that moms who learn to cherish their daughter’s growth and independence have an easier time making the transition. While my daughters are not yet adults, I found many of the tips and insights from Mother-Daughter Duet worth storing in the back of mind, preparing for the day my daughters’ set sail.

Mother-Daughter Duet also has me thinking about my relationship with my mother, things I could have done better as a daughter, and things that she did so well, that I should emulate with my own daughters.

If you have a struggling relationship with your mom and would like to set it on a healthier path, you will find Mother-Daughter Duet thought provoking. And if you have daughters who are nearing adulthood or are adults, this is definitely worth reading and culling insights from.

 You can learn more about Mother-Daughter Duet on the Random House website or at your favorite bookseller.

Disclosure: This book was provided for review by the WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group.

Have you ever struggled with joy? About three years ago, I realized that I was just doing the work, going through the motions of life, doing what my father taught me – work hard, do what’s necessary without complaint, and just get it done. But I wasn’t really embracing Joy. 

It’s been a long ten years of trials ups and downs, and it is so easy to get caught up in the day to day struggles of life, in doing what needs to be done, that it is easy to miss the opportunity for joy often masked by our focus on the work or the struggle.

If you can relate, then I recommend you check out Dancing with My Father by Sally Clarkson. I’ve been using this book for my personal daily devotional time for the last couple weeks, and it speaks directly to this struggle to find that Joy that God wants us to experience.

Through personal stories and real-life examples, Sally Clarkson shares her own journey to finding the joy, purpose, and passion that God wants us to experience in amongst our daily lives.

A story of a friend finding joy in friendship and testimony during the last days of life, reflections from relationships with friends and her daughter are all tools in Dancing with My Father to bring you closer to your heavenly father, and learn to find that joy in life, despite the daily struggles.

With 200 pages broken into 10 chapters, Dancing with My Father works great for a two week daily bible study. The stories and examples speak to the heart, especially if you have felt similar struggles. Discussion questions at the end of each chapter lend themselves well for journalling and personal bible study, or would make a great launching point for using the book for a ten-week group bible study.

I found myself jotting down notes, quotes, and thinking about that day’s chapter when I was out and about. Because of Sally Clarkson’s stories, I find myself stopping more to reflect on what is beautiful at work or on display in my life, with my kids, and with the world around me.

I still have a ways to go before I’m fully experiencing joy in my world, but reading Dancing with My Father has definitely brought more joy into my world, and given me insights into how to delve deeper in Christ and experience the joy He wants for each of us.

Dancing with My Father is headed to my reference shelf for another run through later when I need it again, and hopefully to share with my daughter when she is an adult and is ready to find the joy in what is often overwhelming day-to-day life.

You can find out more about Dancing with My Father by Sally Clarkson on the Random House website or by visiting your favorite bookseller.

Enjoy!

Disclosure: This book was provided for review by the WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group.

Christian book publisher, Thomas Nelson, recently sent me a complimentary review copy of  The LightKeeper’s Daughter by Colleen Coble as part of their BookSneeze program.

The book came right around Christmas, in perfect time for me to take some time to kickback and do some reading just for me. And this book did not disappoint.

The Lightkeeper’s Daughter is set in the early 1900s, in a small rural town of Mercy Falls, set on the North Coast of California, and revolves around Addie Sullivan, a young woman, and her journey to find out who she really is, after a stranger revealed that the parents who raised her were not actually her biological parents at all.

With the help of the stranger, she gets a job as a governess for the family from which she is supposedly related, not disclosing who she thinks she is. And from there the mystery of how she came to be separated from her biological family and why is played out. And of course during this she falls in love with her young charge’s father.

This a Christian historical romance with a bit of mystery and suspense, which is right along what I prefer for light, relaxing reading. The book is set in a place where I have actually lived (Ferndale, CA), so it was nice to see how well the author weaved truth and fiction together.

The story was interesting and flowed well for me, to the point where I didn’t put it down while my family watched a movie in the same room. Perfect for light, escape reading, it’s a book that stimulates the mind to figure out the mystery and warms the heart with a little Christian romance. 

If you like a little suspense and a little historical romance, The LightKeeper’s Daughter is a good read, one that I would share with my mom and mother-in-law in a heart beat, and would even let my daughter read.

You can find The Lightkeeper’s Daughter at Thomas Nelson, on Amazon.com, on Christianbooks.com, or possibly even your local library

My 12 yo daughter is nearly done with Teaching Textbooks Math 7 (she’ll finish by Spring Break in March 2010) and my 10 yo son just started a few months ago.

So, when another homeschool mom asked me about Teaching Textbooks, as a possible homeschool math curriculum for her 9 yo son, I was happy to answer her questions.

One of these days I’ll write a full review, but in the meantime, if you are considering Teaching Textbooks as a possible homeschool math curriculum, I’ve pasted our Q&A here.  If you have additional questions about Teaching Textbooks, feel free to put them in the comments, and I’ll do my best to answer them.

Does your son like it?

Yes, my 10 yo son  likes it. All the lessons are fully explained in video format, and all the answers are fully explained step by step, so if he misses something he can click the solution button and see where he went wrong.

He does not like that each lesson is so long, i.e., has so many problems (20 problems, plus 5 practice problems per lesson). He’s used to a much shorter program, but he has adapted by doing a 1/2 lesson per day or a minimum of 2-3 lessons per week.

Any ideas about placement?

The Teaching Textbooks  has placement tests for each level, I highly recommend using them. Don’t go by what you think is the grade level; it’ll depend on what math program you’ve used in the past and where your son is currently at.  The placement test does a good job helping you position the student in the correct level. 

Also, you can look at the table of contents of each course to see what’s covered and see if your son is ready for that level of work. In my case, Teaching Textbooks Math 7 covers fractions, decimals, and some basic geometry, which is a good transition from our elementary math program, which is weak in these topics (in my opinion), before they are ready for Beginning Algebra.

Though I have to say because we moved from a mastery-based elementary math program to Teaching Textbooks (a spiral based program), there was lots of overlap in some areas and none in others.

I did placement tests with my son a couple times over two years because he was strong in some areas and not in others, and finally when he was ready, I just moved him into Teaching Textbooks Math 7, and that’s worked well.

From my perspective, it’s a big change for me, they basically don’t need me for math anymore (yes, I’m a little sad about that). My 12 yo daughter periodically will have a question when she gets a problem wrong and can’t figure out why (and doesn’t want to view the solution on the computer.)

But other than that…there’s no prep, no lesson planning, no teacher time at all. Just setting boundaries and saying “go do your math”. Which of course is a huge time saver.

Is it all on computer?

Depends on how you do it. It can be done completely on the computer, though you need a notebook or something to work the problems in.

The text book also contains all of the lesson materials (except the step-by-step walkthroughs & solutions, which are only on the CDs).

Because of some issues we were having with my kids, we now require the kids to do all the problems out of the book on paper.

So what my daughter does is watch the lesson on the computer (rather than read it), then does the problems out of the book (in a notebook, so the book stays nice for later resale and younger siblings), checks her answers after each problem in the answer booklet, and then inputs her answers into the computer for grading purposes.

My son watches the whole lesson and the problems on the computer, but works each problem on paper, checks the answer, reworks as necessary, and then enters the answer into the computer, and moves on to the next problem.

Different kids, different styles. But either way I require that they don’t move on to the next problem until they got the one they are working on right (no use doing the whole set wrong and then going back and fixing it…)

What about the testing/grading…is it on the computer as well?

There’s a quiz after each chapter, which is all dealt with on the computer (or in the textbook, see above). All the grading is done automatically for you on the computer and it keeps a record of it all for you. (nice)

Update: The high school level Teaching Textbook programs do not include the automated grading.

Is there a “lesson plan” or something that tells me how to get through it in a school year?

I’m not really sure. In Teaching Textbooks Math 7, there’s 118 lessons plus a quiz after each of the 18 chapters, so assuming 1 lesson a day for an 180 day school year, that’s pretty much how to get through it in a year.

You could look at the Table of Contents in the Teaching Textbook  you are looking at and see how it would break down. I set goals for the kids this way, based on where they are at, and how many weeks are left in the term, and how many lessons I think they can get through in a week and then term allowing for days off and slippage.

We’ve chosen not to try to complete it in a year. It’s taken my daughter at least a year and a half. There have been some chapters where she did a whole lesson a day, and others where a 1/2 of a lesson a day is fine.

But my style is to just let them go through it at whatever their pace is and not worry about what level they are in each year…just continuing on until they learn it. 

If you are working & homeschooling like I am, or are math challenged, or have a child who does best with visual or audio teaching methods, then Teaching Textbooks is a good, solid, and thorough math curriculum worth looking at further.

During October, I added what I had hoped would be a fun bit of schoolwork to my 10 and 12 yos schedule – the Halloween Creative Writing Elective from Connect the Thoughts (CTT).  Billed as a history/creative writing elective, I had hoped that the kid would learn more about the true roots of Halloween, and exercise  their writing skills in a fun way.

The Halloween elective is marketed for those 9 years old and up. And really in our experience, it is best of those who are comfortable writing paragraphs. The elective was a stretch for my 10 yo, who ended up dictating much of his work for this elective, but it was wonderful for my 12 yo daughter.

There are sixteen lessons, the first lesson and the last lesson are the history peices, while the other fourteen lessons are centered around how to write a scary story.  Connect the Thoughts has one of the few writing curricula that I like, and this elective does not disappoint from a creative writing perspective.

The history lessons cover the roots of Halloween, primary its Celtic history, and modern traditions like UNICEF, trick or treating, and Fall Festivals or Halloween Parties. As is standard in all CTT history lessons, the two history lessons include a geography component and vocabulary.

There is a list of suggested literature at the beginning of the elective, with suggestions for both younger students (9-10 yos) and for older, high school level students. But there isn’t any requirement in the curriculum itself to read anything.

Like all Connect the Thoughts courses, CTT Halloween is written for the student to use independently. All the lessons talk directly to the student. Materials wise, the only things the students need are a computer to type their stories on and to follow a few history links (celtic music and language examples), a world map (or one on a computer), and a globe. Everything else is right there in the instructions.

Primarily this is a creative writing lesson. During the course, students write two scary stories – Learning how to develop primary and secondary characters, plotting, and the structure of a scary story. 

My 10 yo son chose to write a story about two boys trapped in a world of all girls; while my 12 yo daughter, developed a more traditional scary story. Since her story is a little long to publish here, I thought I’d share just the beginning (unedited) as a sample of what the creative writing portion inspired:

Nightmare on Halloween by K.E.S.

Drake woke up on the floor. He groaned, his neck hurt from sleeping in the wrong position. He could hear his attic bedroom groaning in the autumn wind. he looked out the window someone was standing in the backyard staring up at the window, it was a man he was as pale as the moon, he wore a pitch black business suit his thick hair was the same color, but his eyes were nothing like Drake had ever seen they were red and they didn’t have any pupils or whites of the eye. Drake shivered the Man smiled to this, reviling fangs. Drake shut the drapes and ran to his bed tripping over Barren his Dalmatian puppy he had gotten for his 8Th birthday two months ago. Barren sat up sniffed the air and growled, he went over to the window still growling. Drake ran to him picked him up and took a peek out the window; there was no man in the yard. Drake sighed in relief and carried Barren to his bed and lay down and was about to go back to sleep when his alarm went off.

 When Drake was done getting dressed for the day, he went down stairs where his mom was making breakfast and his little 5 year old sister Nadine or as everyone called her Natty. Natty in her blue long sleeved shirt with pink butterflies and long thick jeans was trying to put a pink bow in her long red curls. Drake looked nothing like his little sister he looked like his dad with dark brown hair and a wiry figure.

 As Drake starting eating his breakfast he saw the same man staring at him through the kitchen window he was licking his lips with a forked tongue, Drake suddenly went very pale, he felt sick to his stomach.

 ”Mom Drake looks like he’s about to throw up!” screeched Natty, moving away from him as she did so.  

 ”Are you okay?” asked his Mom.

 ”Yeah Fine” Mumbled Drake still staring at the Man outside the window.

 Drake’s mother looked at the window and the man vanished instantly.

 On the way to school he kept seeing man in between buildings as he and Natty walked through the suburbs houses. Drake thought he was going insane so one time he stopped and pointed the man across the street out to Natty. When Natty looked at the spot where Drake was pointing it took only a moment for Natty’s pale skin to turn to white as paper, she opened her mouth to scream when the man smiled, but no sound came out when put a finger to his lips.

 ”Who is he?” Squeaked Natty

 ”I saw him this morning when looked out my window.” Drake squeaked back.

 They were frozen as he came towards them; he was licking his lips and reaching out a hand with nails that looked like claws. They tried to run but it was like they were covered in hard cement. Suddenly a man on a bike was racing towards them and went strait through the man who was coming towards them, as the biker went through him all his body part deteriorated until there was nothing left but a skeleton. The skeleton collapsed along with the bike onto the street, the man smiled as if he had just eaten a chocolate cake.

 

Overall, the kids had fun with this. Again it was a stretch for my 10 yo to do this much writing, but my 12 yo was able to handle it with no problems. And even though it was a stretch for my 10 yo, this was the first time he’s been willing to write (or dictate) this long of a story (his was nearly 1000 words). Personally, I had hoped for more history. But as a creative writing elective, I am happy with the choice.

Note: I did cross out a few items in the last lesson that pertained to planning a Halloween party and/or celebrating Halloween in traditional American ways, as that’s not something we do as a family. But that was the only thing I needed to change.

CTT Halloweenis regularly $25, available only as a downloadable ebook. The curriculum has great sales and I was able to pick up this elective for less than $10. I can’t guarantee that you’ll find the same deal, but, if you are interested in a fun way for your kids to learn to write a scary story, I recommend picking up CTT Halloweeen while it’s on sale.

…Shannon